Game? Review: Godville ZERPG

So what do you do if you want to play an RPG (role-playing game) and you don't have the time to play it.  Of course, you can just watch someone else play, like countless other people who seem to enjoy watching Let's Play videos, but if you prefer seeing your own character do their own thing, Godville might just be the game for you.

So, you just got a personal heroine! It's good to have a follower who will pray to you and do stupid things in your honor, isn't it? You don't need to control her directly, because she's smart enough to figure things out on her own. All you need to do is to visit her once in a while and show some signs of life, because the heroine needs a god to believe in. Your heroine will write down all the important events of her life in the diary, so you will always know what she is up to

I encountered ZRPGS (or ZERPGS for Zero-Effort RPGs) from an article in Kotaku.  Someone in the comments section recommended Godville and 11 days later, my Heroine is Level 13, died twice, lost 9 duels and won 7 and I'm 2.6% on my way to getting more Golden Bricks for my own temple.

 I play from my iPad mostly, checking up on my heroine twice or thrice a day. I used to check more during the first few days, frequently healing my heroine so help her along.  Then I discovered dueling!

Dueling in Godville allows you to duel other player non-controlled characters.  Losing makes you feel awful (not as bad as your heroine feels of course) but plenty bad since you do have a Win / Loss stat (and I'm quite grade conscious).  You duel in a more or less level playing field, since both heroes are equalised in terms of health points (HP).   The fight goes randomly, and you make and take hits every turn (a turn seems to last either 30 secs or a minute, haven't really measured nor read up on it).

During the start of each duel, random conditions are set: ranging from deities not being allowed to interfere to limiting the number of actions a deity can do during the course of the duel.  Winning (and losing) conditions  are also set, as well as the prize being fought for.

Of course, you can influence your heroes' fight positively or negatively.  You have Godpower, which allows you to encourage (heal) or punish (I'm not too sure since I am quite a nice encouraging deity) your hero.  My heroine has taken hits from the opposing deity, so I can just assume that punishing deals damage (randomly too, sometimes hitting one or both heroes).

Of course, aside from dueling, your hero also does the usual things a player character does in an RPG, that is, kill monsters, get loot, sell loot, buy better gear. Rinse, repeat. 

One of the major goals for you, as a deity, is to get a temple built for you.  Your hero can get this done by collecting enough golden bricks, which she does so randomly (or by dueling).  As it is, I calculate that I'll probably get my temple done in one and a half years.  Thank the even higher deities that I have an adequate store of patience (which, unfortunately, cannot be accumulated).

Oh yeah, your hero can also join guilds (something beyond your control), but you can also talk to other fellow deities via in game chat.

You can 'play' Godville in pretty much any platform, mobile or otherwise:  there's that iOS app, then I believe there's also an Android version. Of course, you can always play on y our browser.  I suggest setting a password so you can keep track of your heroine's comings and goings in multiple devices.

There are other games of like nature around but Godville, with its mix of humour, randomness, semi-control and polish, is my ZERPG of choice. Admittedly, ZERGP isn't exactly a game for everyone (I mean, it's text-based for one), since it requires so little of your time and effort (the one thing you really need to do is resurrect your hero if they die), it might be worth keeping on your phone or tablet just as an excuse to seem busy (oooh lots of text scrolling, you must be some sort of genius hacker, or a voracious reader at least).  Try it out, you just might like it.

Verdict: 4/5 Fun for what it is

TL;DR:

++ The wit, the puns

+ Free

+ Little Effort Required

+ Multi-platform, persistent

- Text-based

Details:

Site: https://godvillegame.com/

Platforms: Browser Based, iOS, not sure about Android

Anime Review: Wizard Barristers: Benmashi Cecil

I loved the opening minutes of Wizard Barristers -- for one, its doesn't start out introducing the main character as 'an ordinary high school student.'  Whee! A protagonist in their twenties!  You see Quinn and his pretty boy partner shooting up a Wud (or a non-Muggle or a Wizard in WB-speak), causing a train to derail and then arresting the fuck out of him.

The animation was awesome! The art: lovely!  I stopped walking on my elliptical walker just to see what else happens: the Wud was sentenced and his death was pretty gruesome (not bloody, but gruesome in its immediacy and lack of ceremony).

Then, Cecil Sudou happened.

She's 17, a Wizard Barrister -- the youngest ever! Really! everyone is so keen to remark on how young she is and how awesome she is and how brilliant she is.  Rinse and repeat until episode 11 and that's the entire series in a nutshell.

Mary-fucking-Sue.

It's a shame, too: I love the art and the quality of the animation, as I mentioned, though you can feel the quality deteriorate mid-way through the series.  You see your China-quality animation with distorted eyes and faces and all around lowering of visual quality.

The characters are interesting at first, but it all just went downhill when they became members of the Cecil Sudou fan club.

It could have been quite a good series, too, with the courtroom drama reminiscent of Phoenix Wright, Ace Attorney games - you almost expect the barristers to shout "OBJECTION" followed by a series of magic missiles.  The world of WB is also quite interesting, with people being overtly anti-magic to the point where the Wuds are considered second-class citizens, with lesser rights and an abbreviated justice system aimed at whacking the judge's hammer at any magic user dumb enough to use their magic.

By episode 8 or 9, I pretty much gave up on the series; so did the animators apparently as evidenced by the aforementioned downhill slide in quality.

As it is, I suggest skipping this series and finding something else to waste your time on.

Verdict: 2/5 Skip it.

TL;DR:

+ Great Art (first half)

+ Great Animation (first half)

+ Interesting character design

+ Metaloids (robots made from magic) are an interesting concept

------ It's all about Cecil Sudou

- Story is hardly coherent: everything is just about Cecil Sudou and how special she is!

-- Such a wasted opportunity, the source material could have been so much better

Details:
Genre: Mary Sue, Sci-Fantasy, Mahou-Shoujo sorta
Episodes: 12 (I only saw 11)
Aired: January to March 2014

Book Review: The Providence of Fire (Book 2 of the Chronicles of the Unhewn Throne) by Brian Staveley

Staveley is no Feist  (who does the best large scale battles that I've read so far) when it comes to battles, but it's okay; the rest of it more than makes up for that lack -- the politics, the grit, the tension, the bloodletting.  Despite being a trilogy (supposedly), this middle part does not lack in any of the usual departments middle volumes suffer - true, there's a hell of a cliffhanger at the end, but the story stands on its own well, being propped well up by the first volume.

Since The Emperor's Blades did most of the world-building and character setting, The Providence of Fire is pretty much non-stop action, taking up where the first volume left off, with the characters jumping from the frying pan and into the fire and then down into the gas tank.  Everybody is just so... hard pressed, and it works! Pressure turns rock into diamonds and the characters are gems in their own little blindfolded worlds - you can see bits and pieces of information being parceled out and the characters reacting to these bits of information, and to each other, accordingly.

And the characters are not predictable - you'd think they'd head one way and find them jumping headlong backwards, leaving you screaming (inside yourself) at them to head the fuck back, or forward, or sideways.

This is a different sort of tension from George R.R. Martin's bloodletting - a different flavour; I often find myself holding my book in a state of shock reading one of GRRM's bloody plot twists.  Stavely hooks fingers inside your nostrils, drags you along, down, and further down with you unable to let go.

Aaaaand, I'm not quite sure whom to believe! Everybody has their own little version of truth, of points of view, of facts so concrete you could've sword that last revelation one chapter back could not be true -- no reliable points of view here folks!

So, i'm probably a year or so away from the sequel and I'm trying to find other books to read to pass the time.  It's going to be sooo much fun.

Verdict 5/5 Go read the first volume already!

TL;DR:
+ A sequel! With none of the usual sequelitist issues
+ Moar everything! It makes investing in the duller bits of the first book oh so worthwhile
++ The characters become dearer to you, especially since they're usually in danger of getting killed, maimed or both -- no one's safe!
- Descriptions of battles could be better, but this is not that sort of book
+ Longish book, but it sure didnt feel like it
+ Simon Vance narrated this pretty good on the Audible Version

Details:
Author: Brian Staveley
Genre: Epic Fantasy
Book Length: 608 Pages (Hardcover Version)
Read on: Audible Version by Simon Vance
Published: January 13, 2015 (A year after the first book!)
Preceded by: The Emperor's Blades
Amazon Link:  http://www.amazon.com/Providence-Fire-Chronicle-Unhewn-Throne/dp/148051764X

Movie Review: Hector and the Search for Happiness

Hector and the Search for Happiness is up there in the Happiness movie genre, which typically crops up once or twice a year, catering to middle-aged folks (or those nearing it) who are, well, unhappy.  The nearest analogy to this movie that I can think of is Zoolander sequel, better known as The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, with less graphics and more heart and without Ben Stiller's dull-eyed excuse for a soulful stare'

I liked that movie, Zoolander 2, but the first Zoolander set my opinion of Stiller for life, that is to say, he tries so hard but seems to stuck in the same Sandlerese tendency to believe that his grasp is longer than his reach. Or something.

Hector, which stars Simon Pegg, has a problem -- he's middle aged and wonders where his life is going.  He's successful, has a girl, yet he's... you guessed it! Unhappy!.  Well, maybe not exactly unhappy, but he's unsure what happiness really is.  Which is a problem when you're there, as a psychiatrist, to decipher what it would take for his numerous patients to reach their own goal of personal happiness.

So he solves it the way all middle-aged people do: buy a sports car.  The end.

Well... not quite, he travels (leaving the sports car) and experiences life in all its variety, chronicling his experiences in a travel book and dealing with the changing aspects of his life and his relationship with his girlfriend.

It might not seem like it, but this movie touched me immensely, not as much as The Theory of Everything, but having seen both movies one after another had me master the art of crying beside your girlfriend without being too obvious about it.  With the lights on, too.

This movie has a heart, and not just because it involved an actual romantic (or non-romantic) relationship between Hector and his girlfriend, as compared to the lack of one in Zoolander 2, but Simon Pegg, which is known for his comedic acts, brought about a gamut of emotions in that highly mobile and expressive face of his.  You still get funny moments, but they're funny in the way life is funny, whether the situation is tragic, or joyful or anything else in between.  There is grace and indignity and life and love and all those silly words that is very, very human and not too ruined by the act of making this movie and making sure it hits the right notes and passes its test screenings.



Ehem.

But, really, watch this movie.  It's great fun.  Just maybe not with your girlfriend, or, at least, not with the lights on.  You can only tell her you were cutting onions so many times before she stops believing you.

Rating: Highly Recommended 5/5

TL;DR:
++ Simon Pegg
+ A feel-good movie that doesn't try too hard
+ They spelled 'happiness' right
+++ Rosamund Pike <3

Details:
Genre: Dramedy, Happiness
Release Date: Sometime in August, 2014 (At least in Germany)
Runtime: 114 min
Notable Stars: Simon Pegg, Rosamund Pike
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1626146/

Book Review: The Emperor's Blades (Chronicle of the Unhewn Throne) by Brian Staveley

I'm thankful I managed to read through this book; halfway through the second one, it turned out to be one of the better fantasy epics I've read in ages, even better than Sanderson's Way of Kings in some ways (it has none of the inherent 'niceness' in Sanderson's works for one thing).

Imagine Jordan's Wheel of Time series, with the political complexity of George R.R. Martin's Song of Fire and Ice.  It helps that Staveley is pretty unpredictable and has a ruthless streak to him, short of GRRM's bloody-mindedness, he still makes me careful about caring too much about the characters I come across.

The first book of the Chronicle of the Unhewn Throne starts slow, as most epic fantasy series go -- it was a struggle for me to listen through three fourths of the book, to the point where I almost gave up on it.  It was slow, and ponderous, as it took its time introducing the three main characters, the environment around them and the world at large.  The novel had world-building in troves, with areas upon areas, countless titles and made-up terms, and bits of the requisite ancient language thrown in.

Having to listen to everything was both easier and harder, as the fantasy jargon had a harder time sticking to my mind.  Having to deal with three separate points of view also made it harder for me to get into the groove of things; this paid off in the second book though as each character and their respective manure filled situations took lives of their own (think Robert Jordan's fourth or fifth book in the WoT series, at least we did not have to go through three books before the action heated up).

The world of the Unhewn Throne does include magic (kennings in Hewnspeak), in limited doses as magic users are generally reviled and are pretty much burnt in stakes the moment they are found.  The main empire does not feel much like your typical European setup, but smacks a bit of the orient and a mish-mash of other influences, enough so that you don't feel like its too familiar a ground, without being too disoriented by straying too far from familiar tropes.  It works too as the world feels big without feeling empty, strange enough without being too alien.  The balance here is nicely struck.

The main characters -- the emperor's children, are well fleshed out and work within the bounds of their respective situations.  They are each distinctive, and you can almost see how they'd grow up to be and the parts they will come to play within the Empire... and then all that gets turned into jellied shit as Stavely puts them into a blender without the cover open.  They make it with most of their limbs intact but they do grow as characters.  As with the world-building, the character building gets its payoff in the second book, as the author spends less time sketching out the protagonists and goes into storytelling all-out.

I highly, highly, highly recommend this story with just a few caveats: it starts slow but you'll just have to deal with that.  It's also a trilogy but we're only into the second book (which just came out this year).  So... if you like a good epic fantasy read, go for it.  If you like your fantasy story with grit, this is it!  Now if you don't mind, I'm going back to my listening.

Verdict: Very Highly Recommended (4/5)

TL;DR:

- Starts slooooow

++ Elaborate world building

++ Good balance between a familiar world and a fresh one

-/+ Three points of view makes for variety but gets in the way of pacing

+ Good distinct protagonists, though the cast of characters aren't that wide

++ The politics of it is very good; it's no simple hack-and-slash, problems actually get solved politically

+/- It's a Trilogy!

Details:

Author: Brian Staveley
Genre: Epic Fantasy
Book Length: 480 Pages (Hardcover Version)
Published: January 14, 2014
Amazon Link:  http://www.amazon.com/Emperors-Blades-Chronicle-Unhewn-Throne/dp/0765336405

Movie Review: That Thing Called Tadhana

Watching this movie is like spending two hours listening to your friends bitch and moan about their recent breakup -- yep, it's that appealing.  The bulk of the movie is spent with the two lead characters (and the only characters at that) talking and eating and travelling and talking and eating and travelling (rinse+repeat).

The movie has a very indie vibe, with low production values and limited crew.  Despite the rawness, it's well made -- I saw no overt flaws, technical or otherwise (excepting a few lines of dialogue with the background noise not scrubbed out, but I'm nitpicking).

So girl is heartbroken, guy is heartbroken, they meet and deal with it.  They spend the entire time just discussing how much time, effort and heart they sunk into the doomed relationship.  The flow of the movie is reminiscent of that old Ethan Hawke movie Before Sunrise, to the point where I'm thinking, given the relative buzz and success Tadhana (Fate/Destiny) 0seemed to have enjoyed, is Tadhana'd to have a sequel or two in the horizon.

I enjoyed the movie, but probably because I like Angelica Panganiban (a lot), and two hours worth of AP is fine by me.  The guy she's with (whose name eludes me), is pretty charming and reminds me of your typical doormat anime lead/protagonist (GF agrees, at least with the charming and 'cute' part).  There is chemistry (I think) and feels (not so much, for me that is :P) and maybe one or two kilig moments.  The movie would have been better received, by me, again, if I were heartbroken/feeling down/suicidal.

(yep, the entire movie looks like that cap above)

So, I heartily recommend it if:

• You or your friend is heartbroken
• You like Angelica Panganiban
• You're interested to see what a group of talented people in the local movie scene can come up with on a shoestring budget and a bunch of digital cameras

I'm just sort of disappointed there weren't that many memorable lines (unless you're full on 100% attention span on it, I suppose), since the movie is just two people talking... a lot.  No dramatic scenes, not much crying, it's full of commas and not enough exclamation points!!!

Verdict: 4/5 Watch it with caution :D It broke my heart. Sorta.

TL;DR:
+ Angelica Panganiban
- Angelica Panganiban (most people I've met either liked her or hated her, I guess she's just that kind of person)
+ copious amounts of lines with putang-ina in it
+ ... by Angelica herself
- Lack of memorable lines
- Much dialogues
-/+ movie broke my heart (and I cannot exactly say why)
+ Angelica Panganiban

Details:
Genre: Romance, Bitching and Moaning
Release Date: Feb 4, 2015
Running Time: Longer than it felt
Notable Stars: Angelica Panganiban
IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4170436/

Anime Review: Brynhildr in the Darkness

I'm not quite sure what made me dislike watching this series; maybe it's the irregular pacing, which involves action heavy scenes and time-stopping conversations in-between.  Or perhaps it's the amount of fan service they put in, and then having the plot being rushed to make up for the time spent in hot springs or in the beach.  It's just like setting an appointment with someone and finding them arriving either too early, too late but never on time -- the series is just too... jarring for me, pacing-wise.

This might be a minor quibble, if the positives outweighed the negatives.  Unfortunately, it's the other way around -- the pacing, the plot-holes, the characters being too 2D.  Or perhaps given the number of excellent anime out there (which I'm watching alongside this series: the To-Aru series or the Chunibyo series, to name a few) makes Brynhildr in the Darkness feels something short of acceptable.

Well, to tell you a bit about the series: it's basically a harem anime, where the harem members are super-powered witches created for the usual power-hungry reasons by a bunch of literally faceless men.  The powers are your typical fare, consisting of destruction to time manipulation and the like.  I found these powers and their limitations to be interesting enough, and the how's and the why's are also the main reason why I slogged through 13 episodes worth of mediocrity.

The characters are typical harem fare as well, and while they're nicely designed and animated, I found the sheer amount of fan service to be distracting (not in a good way).  The back-story is meh and the lead character is your typical overly sensitive busy-body that would pass as the 'ideal' for these kinds of setups (either that or the nice but perverted lead).

At best, I'd call this series average.  But unless you have absolutely nothing else to watch: skip it and go for a series that's more worth your time.

Verdict: 2/5 Don't go for it unless you've no other choices, and there are a lot of good choices out there.

TL;DR:
+ Interesting Premise
+ Nice looking art.  I do like Miss Neko and her moles
+ I love the both OP's.  I did not skip them (which I normally do) for most of the 13 episodes
- Poor pacing
- Predictable story
- Too much service
+/- Bad enough we see too much service, we get steam and flashes of light to boot
- Characters are meh

Details:
Genre: Harem, Sci-Fi
Episodes: 13
Aired: April to June, 2014

Movie Review: The Little Death

The little death is a movie about love, sex and relationships.  It is also one of the funniest, most awkward, tender, (slightly) romantic, and painful movies I've seen this year.  The movie is essentially about several couples and how they deal with sex and all its quirks -- perfect watching for this Valentine's day (or excuse to watch anyway).  I'm sure anyone who's been in a relationship (though mostly of the longer term sort, not much by way of one-night stands here), can relate with the characters.

The movie is not about sexy stuff or nudity (I don't think anyone got naked at all), so if you're expecting that, well, you know what the Internet is for.  What the movie deals with are several sorts of fetishes -- being aroused by seeing someone cry, or sleep for example, and how the characters go about getting off, whether telling their partners straight up, or in a more roundabout manner.

This is very much worth the watch -- wait for the part with the deaf guy and the phone sex line, though it's at the end of the movie, it had me and the GF laughing so hard we had to stop the movie for a bit just to recover.

Verdict: 4/5 recommended! Some people might find it offensive, though everything's tastefully done.

TL;DR:
+ Funny
+ Awkward
+ You can watch it with your mother
+/- You might or might not want to watch it with your GF/BF

Details:

Release Date: September 25, 2014 (Australia)

Genre: Comedy, Sex, Relationships

Running Time: 95 Mins based on IMDB

Notable Stars: I totally don't know any of them since they're Aussies.

Seen On: My 23" Monitor

IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2785032/